Food and Booze Gujarati Style

There are cooks who write, conduct TV shows on food and there are wine experts, whisky exeperts and expertson cocktails who write and or conduct tv shows on how to mix a tipple. These are generally pros and they follow two cardinal principles of pros: Talk yourself and your product up and second do not pass opinions on others.

Then there are food and wine critics who nornally write about restaurants they are asked to visit or booze they are asked to sample. These critics are with a few notable exceptions are a part of the marketing exercise of the restaurant or the booze company and are generally invited to wine and dine and if they are still awake at the end of the evening write something good in the morning with a few dashes of "neutral criticism" like the lighting could have been better OR the wine was excellent but the price a tad too high....

Very few people write for consumers with an honest feedback on food, restaurants and drinks and fewer still write practical stuff. It is no point mentioning a dish ingradients of which can only be found either in France or by bribing a friendly airhostess. Or for that matter about a cocktail components of which have to be wholly imported...
I have found two notable exceptions to this rule one writing on food/rstaurants and chefs the other on booze [sans wine]. The first is Vir Sanghvi and the second is Bhaichand Patel. Both write from the consumer point of view and since writing respectively about food and booze are their fourth or fifth pastimes, they write freely without looking over their shoulders... It helps that Sanghvi is a cook himself and Patel enjoys making and consuming drinks...

Unfortunately both of them write in Brunch the Sunday supplement of Hindustan Times and if you do not subscribe to that newpaper you shall not be able to read them. More unfortunately, we just read the last column by Patel last Sunday, he has discontinued writing for Brunch. I Hope Vir wil lcontinue to write his column quite aptly titiled "Rude Food".
Vir is a stake eating gujarati and Bhaicahand is a scotch guzzling one. The former food item is a religious taboo not only among gujaratis but a large number of Hindus. Scotch of course is a political taboo in Gujarat whence the ancestors of both the gentlemen came.

So the best writer on food (especially non-veg) and Booze are both Gujaratis..... Did I hear someone say Indians are dogmatic?

Dry Day and Wet Lips

Why do we have dry days in our country especially on religious and election day? Who started this stupid thing? When and whay? These are some of the questions that bug me once again on the occasion of Republic Day. I can afford to pontificate on the issue since I have stocked up for series of dry days that are coming up in Mumbai in the next one week caused by a heady mixture of politics and respect to the Mahatma.Is it to show respect to our gods and goddesses? If you are a Hindu which the majority of alcohol consumers in India would we, you would know that our Hindu gods and goddesses are capable of quite a few naughty things inlcuding drinking, bitching and politicking. In fact what makes Hinduism so lively is the almost human like behaviour of its gods and goddesses. If you are a Christian, there is no religious taboo on drinking. If you are a Muslim and follow the scriptures you are not supposed to drink and all days are dry for you, if you do not follow the scripture, then there are no dry days. I do not know about sikhs' buddhists' and jains' views on this hence will not comment. But I think Hindus, Muslims and Christians would constitute 90 per cent of the drinking polulation of India and dry day rules would not apply to them specifically. During election time dry days are justified by the fact that booze would be dsitributed to the voters to influence voting. Even if we accpect that voters are stupid, what would stop political parties from stocking up booze especially since they already know that election days would be dry days?

I find it funny, millions of Indians get drunk everyday, go bankrupt chasing the bottle, beat up wives, spoil lives of their children and their own lives but we have only so few dry days.... how pathetic..... Now I need that beer:)
Cheers

Info Overload or Too Much Talktime?

Malavika Sangghavi [Hope I got that spelling right] is on the editorial board of DNA and writes regularly in the newspaper. She is usually interesting to read since she approaches heavy subjects with a light air. Today she wrote about information overload and how the mind is getting cluttered with trivia and how she will never have any use of much of the information she gets. Many examples were quoted all very interesting. All the examples were those of what she thought were useless information - information which we will never use...

I think the it is not a question of information overload or trivia overload. The problem has to be looked at from the other side which is the demand side, only then we can explain the phenomenon of information overload.

What is the demand side of information overload? Simple.... we talk more, we communicate more and population is increasing rather fast hence you need more and more content to talk about everyday. "Information overload" just takes care of this demand.... No this is not a joke.

look at how much you talk everyday and compare this with your dad if you are a man and mom if you are a woman. millions of people are on the phone throughout the day quite literally, or in meeting, or chatting... What do they chat about? what do they talk about? My guess is that essential communication is less than one third of our total communication. So you need that extra bit of information to keep the conversation going 24x7..... I repeat, information overload just takes care of this demand side for information required to keep those phones ringing, faxes running, coffee shops and bars buzzing, living rooms lively and so on.

Keep talking...

Adult Content

Government of India suo motto or on PIL [Public Interest Litigation] regulalry annuounces blocking of internet sites, TV channels and other media on charges of adult content, indecency etc etc.

This is not about national security and or sedition [I shall keep tose for another day!]
The latest victim is a sony channel in India which is known for its funky shows. I have not found anything more wrong in that channels programmes than the semi-nude gyrations that go on and on and on on innumberable music channels, or various participatory programmes where participants repeat those same movie songs in more of less the same costumes on TV for a prize. These are all aired during non-adult hours. Mind you adult in India does not really mean adult [movies are screened and then certified and only then shown on TV].

Are we idiots as a nation or does our government especially departments which take pleasure in social policing have nothing else left to do?

Children sit and watch Mahabharata with frantic parents trying to explain to their children how a woman can have five husbands and still be a paragon of virtue, mythological pieces regulaly have women wearing hideously ugly dresses and much else. In the sixities the temptress Menaka exposing large bellies and much else was a set piece in such mythical films... Religious discourse, supersitious healing, selling of spurious unlicensed goods cover TV from end to end no one thinks of putting a stop to them. Why this bias against adult content [where adult is defined by some act which was passed by a Victorian Colonial Regime 100 years back?]

Our children and parents are quite mature, please give them a break and let them grow up into mature parents and balanced children.

Cheers

Shilpa and Fork

I am apalled to read about the racist slurs cast at Shilpa Shetty on a popular Channel 4 TV Show. But one of the so called racist slurs was significant. Watching her eat with her fingures, one of the "white" house mates commented that "How can you eat with your fingers, God knows whereever they [fingers] go". More than racist i think it was a health advisory. Especially for men who hands tend to feel their centre of gravity all too often.....I have taken the advice seriously and have switched to using forks now... Thanks Shilpa your poison has been my food.

Gandhi and YouTube

I had missed the rather bad quality pole dance take on Gandhi ji on YouTube, but of course in this age of "multimedia" where one media provices content to the other media for survival you cant miss much.YouTube, Orkut, Google Earth have been providing a lot of content to many Indian newspapers and TV channels, it looks like soon the old media will shut down if they are deproved of content by Internet companies and serial killers.Of course thanks to the TV channels I did not miss Gandhi being assassinated once again on National media. Apart from the fact that it was a bad joke poorly played, I did not realise what was the fuss over YouTube all about. Why were there questions of YouTube being punished? I guess you have to make the right noises when the shit hits the fan:)Punish YouTube i you must or if you can but also punish the following first: if you can1. Largest media space devoted last week was to Gandhi ji love for Sarala Devi Chaudhuri Tagore's niece: gravedug in his latest book by Rajmohan Gandhi his grandson:)2. TV channels which constantly spooled and looped the same clip for hours3. A host of other political, academic and other institutions who have capitalised and monetised the great man even when he was alive:)Any way let's not dig too deep into history. As someone mentioned to a national daily "Gandhi ji would have laughed off at this joke but taken some of the galring failures of our politicians more seriously".Amen

Island and Ocean

India has been perceived in the form of island. No my knowledge of geography is not very good, but even I know it is a peninsula geographically speaking. But I was talking about in terms of similies and metaphors. India: Small islands of excellence surrounded by vast ocean of mediocrityIndia: Small Islands of efficiency surrounded by vast ocean of incompetenceIndia: Small Islands of wealth surrounded by vast ocean of povertyIndia: Small islands of education surrounded by large ocean of ignoranceIndia: Smal islands of demcracy surrounded by large ocean of oppressionIndia: Small Islands of meritocracy surrounded by large ocean of nepotismIndia: Small islands of transparency surrounded by large ocean of corruptionExamples can be multiplied ad infinitum. the latest examples is:India: small islands of SEZs surrounded by a large ocean of License Permit RajWhy cant we think of chaning the equation once for all and declare the whole country into an SEZ and keep small islands as areas of License Permit Raj? Will that not be agood ided, if you believe SEZs are such as good idea extend it to the whole country, why play for small change. It's like sex, you want it and you like it go the whole hog or dont start it:)

ShiPM and Singur

For two generations my family from my father's side have been staunch supporters of CPI and then CPM. CPI split when my father was a young man and he decided to be with the "M" half of it while my uncle remained with the mainstream. Since then much water has flown under the Howrah Bridge and the New Hoogly Bridge known as Vidyasagar Setu. CPM is now mainstream for sometime and CPI is the sidekick. If I still have any political affiliation left in me for an organised political party [which is residual and inconsequntial] it is still with CPM. But recent incidents have made me think once again. I say once again because I had once before done the rethinking long and hard after coming to Delhi as a young student and seeing what CPM meant in Delhi compared with what I had seen in Calcutta, had decided it was not my cup of tea to be actively invloved with or to make any sacrifices. I refer to the sordid and tragic affairs at Singur. Last few weeks newspapers in delhi and mumbai are relplete with pictures of Mamata Banerji steadfasty sticking to her fast like only an Indian woman or a true Gandhian can do and many a national leader of respectable and dubious credentials wishpering sweet nothingness into her ears. My problem is simple: My icons going majorly wrong or not explaining to the constituents transparently and truthfully what is happening. On the one hand are my still loved CPM, whom I would like to see in power but not act like a typical "state" and on the other is my much loved corporate and a household name in India the Tata Group whom I would like to lead the great India Inc. success story but somehow can not identify as a ruthless corporate. Of course, there is a third and perhaps the most important dimension: the people of Singur whose lands are being "confiscated" Frankly, I have no love lost for those politicians and local leaders who are making hay while the sun shines or as bengalis would put it "jhorey bok marchey" on both sides of the debate. But I have a few silly questions to the Tatas as well as the CPM run West Bengal government. 1. Why should the government acquire land for a private company? Public good like building a connecting road, a bridge, school etc is understandable, but to build factory? For generating employment, you would say. A good point, but have any guarantees been given for that, especially employing displaced people? 2. Do you really need 1,000 acres of land for a 1 Lakh car? I dunno, please tell me 3. Do you need two/three crop fertile land to build cars? Pune and Jamshedpur were built in the middle of nowhere when they were built, has the logic changed for the Tatas now? 4. Who have been compensated for the acquired land? The people who live off it or people who live off the land's rentier interest? Have the compensated monies gone to small account holders in the local branch of PSU banks or to absentee landlords' MNC bank accounts in Calcutta? 5. What about north Bengal? why not a greenfield project there? It is well connected with north India by the Railways and also by roads, Siliguri is on the national highway 34 and 31 if I am not mistaken and the CPM has been talking about its development for the last 10 years... Isnt it time to walk the talk? There are many questions which will remain unanswered... All of us are watching and this is the best opportuity to make it an ideal case study of what a sensitive government should do and what it should not do. Twist in the Tale? yes there is:) The peasants protesting today are the same empowered over the last 25 years by the same government. And, the Durgapur Expressway on which Singur is and which has actually shot up the land prices in Singur was also built by the current government to boost indsutrialisation of the stateLal Salam!

For a Penny Less

13 years back when I made my first passport I paid a fee of 100 Rupees, a bribe of 1500 rs at the passport office and a bakhshish of 300 rs to a policeman. As a result of which i was privileged to see my passport being "made" in front of me. A rare honour isnt it?I must say I got a huge return on the investment that I had made on my passport inlcuding a 6 year stay in England. That was bribe well spent:)After a three year lapse, I decided to renew my passport and keeping in mind the inflation, had set aside adequate amount to be spent under various heads. But this time the total cost has come down dramatically as has the time to get a passport. The break up is like this: Passport fee 1500 Rs, bribe at passport office, none, bakhshish to policeman, none. I actually spent less money 13 years later to get a new passport. Who says India is not developing?

Dog Poop and More Crap

My dog has been salivating for the last few days figuratively speaking. Dogs normally salivate a lot, but the change of behaviour in my dog has been stimulated by the fact that the pavements in front of my flat in Worli, Mumbai has just been expensively relaid by BMC. What has new pavements got to do with dogs salivating? Everthing, especially in Mumbai. My dog and all my neighbours' dogs in fact all the dogs of the society which has 14 buildings want to crap on the new pavement. On being asked they reply that such is the trend in the trendier part of the town such as Nariman Point. The Dogs in my locality just want to follow the latest trend.Things came to a pass some days backwhen my dog sat on his haunches and was just about to do it. I had to unceremoniously pull him up and explain the following to him:1. As conscious citzens and citydogs we should supplement the efforts of the government to keep the city clean.2. I do not have 500 bucks to give away as fine nor do I have Jonny Josheph's (Municipal Commissioner) mobile number to call him3. I am not famous enough to start a civil disobedience over dog poop and get mindshare4. I do not have access to newspaper space to run my campaign. Finally, I also mentioned to my dog that should he feels too strong about crapping on new pavements, he should walk down to Nariman Point and do it there, since there is someone who will encourage him to do so and support his cause.
My dog was more reasonable than I thought and actually gave up his right to crap on clean pavemments.

Wow, Wow