Thursday, March 20, 2008

Loin Kings


Recently in course of a train journey in a very private compartment shared by only three of us, one of my co-passengers mentioned about "fond mammaries". I was a bit startled. Being middle-aged and much worldly wise I have heard of if not seen many types of mammaries but never heard of a fond one. I was further intrigued after I looked up the right spots on my co-passenger and found that what I had guessed all along was right. For he was unmistakebly a man of around 50 years and an serving army officer at that.
All these fleeting feelings, doubts passed in the next 5 seconds when the revered colonel completed the sentence. I realised what he meant was that he had fond "mammaries" of serving in Kashmir. I am of course not quite sure nor did I dare ask, if that was the way the colonel pronounced the word or it was just a freudian slip connected with his fond experiences in Kashmir. [I wondered then how he would pronounce the actual word]
Many of us living in this particular part of the world have had such encounters..... When someone says he will sport you, he does not mean to hunt you down or engage in a 100 metres dash.. but just that he wants to support you. I still wonder how such people would pronounce the real sports.
Hair you go in my part of the world is not a romantic lament about the loss of hair, but the simple : here you go. And if you hear, "hear hear" while eating, please do not mistake it for someone cheering someone else, instead look for hair in your food.
Similarly saxy obviously does not refer to the talents of the 42nd president of the USA with the saxophone, but simply sexy, nor is painty a new initiative by Asian Paints or ICL, but it is you know what...
Of course nothing in the past 20 years had prepared me for "fond mamaries" except one from my earlierst experiments with truth in these parts of the word.... When someone in my part of the world say consumed by the loin, he is not debauched or decadent in the 19th cenury sense of a D H Lawrence [Remember the opening lines of Lolita?]. But simply that a man has been killed and eaten by a lion. I again wonder how they pronounce the original word.
So long.... and I mean it in the original english sense, please. Do not let your dirty mind think otherwise.

5 comments:

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Jack said...

And what happens if you spill Papsi on your clothes? Do you get a Papsi smear?!:-)

Subho Ray said...

you are incredibele:)

Anonymous said...

Came across this today...any answers....being a Bengali, i didn't have any!!



Changing Names
Guess who's Oishorjyo Roy? Obhishek Bochchon's wife, of course. Birendra Sahabog, by the way, plays for the Indian cricket team. And Monmohon Singho is our PM (Narasingha Rao was one of his predecessors). Bengali channels and newspapers have this tendency to not only mis-pronounce everyone's name, but also convert any non-Bengali with even a remotely Bengali-sounding title into a Bengali. Thus, Sanjay Dutt becomes Shonjoy Dutta, to cite just one of hundreds of such examples. There's also the propensity to add a Bengali flavour to names--Baichung Bhutia's name being corrupted to 'Bhai'chung ('Bhai' as in brother) is one of many instances.

We also have this propensity, at times, to twist names of places and countries: the USA becomes 'Markin Jukta Rashtra' in Bengali. One can understand 'Jukta Rashtra' (United States), but what is 'Markin'? And why is it that only Bengalis use this strange term for the USA? This perverted pleasure obtained from changing names to conform to 'Bangla' standards isn't what only the Bengali media revels in. Till a couple of years ago, even Calcutta University used to change names of all its students to a set standard--an Ashish Sen, for instance, would have his name changed to Asis Sen without even a 'by your leave'. Why this peculiar trait among Bengalis? I have no answer, but academicians could perhaps give it a thought and delve deep into the Bengali psyche to search for a plausible reason for this strange penchant for changing names.

Anonymous said...

this is incredible... But why anonymous?
As an aside, my name was changed in Calcutta University from Subhojyoti Roy to Subhajyoti Ray.. bringing me in league with the great Satyajit Ray.

My history professor at JNU introduced us to the temble politics of South India in a very simble way. Can you guess which state was he from?